--- title: 'Why the school with the highest test scores wasn’t the right fit for my child with ADHD ' description: She sold her home and moved so her son with ADHD could go to a school with high test scores. When it didn't work out, this mom found a better fit for her child. slug: why-the-school-with-the-highest-test-scores-wasnt-the-right-fit-for-my-child-with-adhd author: Lia Martin published: '2019-10-16T11:56:16.975Z' thumbnail: https://cdn-images.understood.org/p0qf7j048i0q/EAB7D5527E644720A482F878AE211E13/50f687910c70c1892bfac03e7f002391/082918_Why_the_Grade_School_With_the_Best_Test_Scores_Wasnt_Right_for_My_Sons_ADHD.jpg source_url: https://www.understood.org/en/articles/why-the-school-with-the-highest-test-scores-wasnt-the-right-fit-for-my-child-with-adhd lang: en --- # Why the school with the highest test scores wasn’t the right fit for my child with ADHD I’m the mother of a [twice-exceptional](https://www.understood.org/en/articles/gifted-childrens-challenges-with-learning-and-thinking-differences) son who just started sixth grade. Tay is gifted. He also has [ADHD](https://www.understood.org/en/articles/what-is-adhd), [anxiety](https://www.understood.org/en/articles/anxious-vs-anxiety), high-functioning autism, and epilepsy. Despite these challenges, he finished elementary school above grade level in math, and almost above grade level in English language arts. I was so proud as I sat through Tay’s fifth-grade graduation ceremony. But I wasn’t prepared for what would come afterward. Graduation was filled with cheers, tears, and, much to my surprise, a message to me from his teacher: “Tay holds a special place in my heart...I know he walked toward a bright, exciting future.” There were high-fives and chest bumps celebrating the end of homework and dioramas for the summer all around me. But I just strolled the schoolyard in a haze, taking in what Tay’s teacher had said. Other mothers approached me and volunteered to take Tay on summer outings with their kids. I watched Tay collect phone numbers from fellow classmates to keep in touch. I stared in amazement while he seamlessly allowed school staff to hug him (despite his intense aversion to physical touch). That whole morning felt surreal, because life wasn’t always that harmonious for Tay. Before he entered elementary school, I did extensive research to find the areas in our district with the highest test scores. I began my search with [GreatSchools](https://www.greatschools.org/), which provides key information on schools to help parents assess the best fit for their children. I also referred to the Academic Performance Index scores (this is the formal measurement of academic performance and progress of individual schools in California). We sold our home and found a rental within our budget near a high-performing school — the motherlode. But within weeks at this academic oasis, Tay was having daily [meltdowns](https://www.understood.org/en/articles/the-difference-between-tantrums-and-meltdowns) and seemed to be declining academically. I decided to hire a tutor and do classroom observations. Though Tay had a 504 plan, it appeared that it wasn’t being followed. The teacher wasn’t seating him in the front of the class, breaking down tasks into small chunks, and giving him regular breaks. My frustrations with this situation led to more research, and that research led me to what I hoped was the answer: an IEP. While learning about what an IEP could do for Tay, I enrolled him in [social skills classes](https://www.understood.org/en/articles/faqs-about-social-skills-groups), placed him in therapy, and signed up for support groups and parenting workshops. At the same time, I applied for [charter schools](https://www.understood.org/en/articles/charter-schools-and-learning-and-thinking-differences) and then to magnet schools in our district. Instead of relying on test scores, I toured campuses, spoke to parents, and sat with school staff. I even spoke to students. I relied on my gut. But before I moved my gifted child, I asked that he be [evaluated by the school](https://www.understood.org/en/articles/understanding-evaluations) so that he could qualify for an IEP. I was [denied](https://www.understood.org/en/articles/10-steps-to-take-if-your-child-is-denied-services). And that crushed me. My husband and I decided to enlist help. We found our own superhero in the form of a [special education attorney](https://www.understood.org/en/articles/the-difference-between-special-education-advocates-and-attorneys). Just weeks after we sent off a request from her, Tay was granted an IEP and got accepted into a magnet school that played to his strengths. Tay spent five years of his elementary school career receiving the services he needed to get on track and stay there. He surpassed everyone’s expectations both academically and socially. And while there are still challenging times, most days actually leave us in total agreement with his fifth-grade teacher: He’s heading toward an “exciting future.” --- If you’re thinking about switching schools, learn what the options are for [different types of schools](https://www.understood.org/en/articles/public-private-and-charter-schools-how-they-compare). And find out [what happens to your child’s IEP if you switch schools](https://www.understood.org/en/articles/what-happens-to-your-childs-iep-if-you-switch-schools). --- ## Explore related topics and articles - [Why my son’s dyslexia made it hard to see my daughter’s ADHD](https://www.understood.org/en/articles/why-my-sons-dyslexia-made-it-hard-to-see-my-daughters-adhd) - My son is dyslexic. I am a teacher. Unfortunately, even with a teacher mom, my son wasnt identified early, nor did he benefit from effective reading instruction. Back when he was a child, in the 1990s, it was uncommon to identify dyslexia until after third grade. I beat myself up about that. But tho - [Why I finally went after my dream job after years of focusing only on my son with ADHD](https://www.understood.org/en/articles/why-i-finally-went-after-my-dream-job-after-years-of-focusing-on-my-son-with-adhd) - One of the biggest challenges Ive faced in my life is how to follow my own hopes and dreams while also meeting the needs of my son. He has ADHDandautism. He struggles with sensory processing issuesand gets school services through an IEP. My journey started years ago, when I had moved to Los Angeles - [What having the “wrong” teacher taught me about my son with ADHD](https://www.understood.org/en/articles/what-having-the-wrong-teacher-taught-me-about-my-son-with-adhd) - Your child’s teacher can make all the difference. 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