Parenting Coach

Practical ideas for social, emotional and behavioral challenges

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Work on solutions to social dilemmas.

What you can do

Help your child practice using certain phrases and other positive solutions to social dilemmas. Try to do this as often as possible so he can test out these strategies in the relative safety of home, where you can provide honest feedback and encouragement.

What you can say

“Jacob, Randy will be coming over tomorrow. You know how he likes your remote-control car. Last time he was here, you wanted the remote and you hit him and then he hit you back. Let’s practice what to say if Randy is playing with your car and you want a turn.”

“Do you think it might work if you say ‘Can I please play with that car?’ You could also say, ‘If you give me a turn, I’ll give it back to you as soon as I am finished playing with it.’ Another way to go would be to say, ‘Let’s play with the car together!’”

Why this will help

Practicing social skills at home with you will make it easier for your child to perform in the more pressure-filled settings of school, parties, sports and other kinds of activities. The more he believes he can quickly call up strategies he knows, the likelier he is to use them. And every time he uses a social strategy successfully will build confidence for the next time.

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