Why some kids have trouble making friends

Expert reviewed by Mark J. Griffin, PhD
Quick tips when kids have trouble making friends
- Quick tip 1Pinch-hit as a playmate.Pinch-hit as a playmate.
If a child is lonely, offer to play. Choose something both of you enjoy, like doing a puzzle or going on a hike. Try to get others, like friends and family, to pinch-hit as playmates too.
Why do some kids not have friends? This can be a painful question to ask. When kids aren’t invited places or don’t have anyone to hang out with, it can be hard not to wonder — and worry.
Making and keeping friends is a skill. Some kids develop it naturally at a young age, while others need more time. In some cases, kids simply haven’t met anyone they can connect with.
Different challenges can also get in the way. Some kids get too nervous or anxious to talk to others. Some can start a conversation, but they have trouble coming up with things to talk about. Or they might talk about something other kids aren’t interested in, without noticing the other kids tuning out.
When kids struggle with making friends, it might not have anything to do with their personality. It also doesn’t mean that a child isn’t likeable or funny. It may just mean the child needs a hand building social skills.
Dive deeper
Skills kids need to make friends
Social rules that some kids miss
Next steps
About the author

About the author
Andrew M.I. Lee, JD is an editor and attorney who strives to help people understand complex legal, education, and parenting issues.
Reviewed by

Reviewed by
Mark J. Griffin, PhD has been a professional in the field of learning disabilities for over 45 years. He was the founding headmaster of Eagle Hill School.