Trouble with flexible thinking: Why some kids only see things one way

By Gail Belsky

Expert reviewed by Ellen Braaten, PhD

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  • Quick tip 1

    Play Fannee Doolee.

    In this word game, Fannee Doolee likes words that have double letters. For example, Fannee Doolee likes bees but not bugs. She likes jelly but not jam. Take turns coming up with pairs of words Fannee likes and dislikes.

  • Quick tip 2

    Ask “How many ways…?”

    Gather different objects like beads, crayons, and buttons. Then ask, “How many ways can we make the number 10?” Take turns picking objects to show different combinations that equal 10 — like two beads, five crayons, and three buttons.

  • Quick tip 3

    Play “Yes, and….”

    One partner sets the scene with a statement like “It’s a cold day here in the mountains.” The next person adds on to it: “Yes, and I can’t seem to find my winter boots.” Go back and forth making “Yes, and…” statements until the story ends.

  • Quick tip 4

    Pretend what objects can be.

    Take a regular object and help kids see how many things they can pretend it is. For example, a funnel could be a party hat, a trumpet, and a unicorn horn. A whiteboard eraser could be a phone, a microphone, and a mustache.

Some kids have trouble switching gears. Changes to a schedule make them anxious or angry. They struggle to cope with change because they can only see one possible schedule or solution. 

These kids struggle with a skill called flexible thinking. Their challenges with finding different approaches to problems can have a big impact on learning and everyday living.

When faced with a problem, kids who struggle with flexible thinking might freeze and do nothing. Or they might try the same strategy over and over, even if it’s not working.

This rigid way of thinking can show up during conversations. For example, kids may not understand that some words have two meanings. It can also show up in schoolwork, like when kids use a math strategy that works for one type of word problem but not with another.

Flexible thinking is part of a group of skills called . Trouble with these skills is common in kids with . But other kids who learn and think differently can also struggle with flexible thinking.

Slow processing speed can also play a role in being able to quickly switch gears and think of solutions.

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