The mid-year reset: How parents can help kids finish the school year strong

We’re officially halfway through the school year. That makes this the perfect moment to pause and reset. In this solo episode, Julian shares why mid-year check-ins matter — and how families can use this “halftime” moment to reflect, adjust routines, and set meaningful goals. 

Most importantly: Talk to your child, partner with teachers, and review those IEP goals!

For more on this topic

• Download: IEP goal tracker

• Read: Questions to ask about your child’s IEP goals

• Listen: How to get over the “mid-year slump”

• Read: Questions you should ask your child about school

Episode transcript

Julian Saavedra: Fam, I've got some good news for you. We are halfway through the school year. I know, right? And I don't know if that comes as more of a relief, a shock, but I do know this: No matter how things have been going so far, now is a great time to pause, take a step back, and ask, "Do we feel good about how things are going so far? Are there things we want to change?"

Welcome to "The Opportunity Gap," a show where we talk about how to navigate the education system. I'm Julian, I am your host. I'm an assistant principal with over 20 years of experience. Today we're talking about how to help your child get through and even thrive in the second half of the school year. We'll get into why this is an important moment to check in with your child, connect with teachers, and build a road map for the rest of the school year.

(00:56) The importance of a midyear check-in

Julian: So I really want to talk about like why does this midyear moment matter? Why is this important? We know that the reality is some of our kids have just had a rocky start. The school year could have been a tough transition, maybe they're going from preschool to elementary school, maybe elementary school to middle school. There could be a whole host of reasons why the transition might have been a little difficult. Your child might be experiencing some anxiety about struggles in school.

Some kids may have had a really exciting or super productive start. And now they might start having that slump. You know, I kind of look at it as like a football game. This is halftime, and if you're a good coach, you're always coaching your team to make adjustments so that you can either continue to play the game at a high level or you can catch up and make up for some lost time. So if you're coaching your child, this is the time to make some adjustments to make sure that you get to the goal that you want. And so we really want to talk about how we can make that reset happen.

(02:01) How to review your child's first half of the school year

Julian: So the first thing that I would recommend is review. Let's look at the tape. How have things gone? What went well? What didn't go well? And that really means just, you know, sit up on a Sunday night after the kids go to bed and really take some time to just reflect. Look over any communication you've had over the year with the school. Look over the systems that you have in place, and think about, "How is the morning routine going? How's the evening routine going? What kind of communication have I had with the school? Are there bright spots that I've heard of? Are there things I'm really happy with? Are there things I want to change?"

And have that idea in your head before you talk with your child. I can tell you as a parent and also as an educator and an administrator, the worst thing that you can do is prime your child for this big sit-down conversation. "Okay, buddy, we're going to sit down and we're going to have a big talk about the beginning of the school year." If you want to see your child turn off really fast, go ahead and say that. Wrong, don't say that at all.

Make sure that you think about a couple of questions. Think about the setting and the space that you can create that's going to make it calm for your child. So if, I know my kids, they love treats and hot chocolate. So maybe have some hot chocolate, have some treats, have some snacks, and casually enter the conversation. And here's what I'd recommend: chunk your conversation into smaller bits and pieces. Start with, "Hey, I was hoping we could talk a little bit about how the school year's gone for you so far. Tell me something you're really proud of. Tell me something that you're struggling with a little bit. Tell me what you think you need help with."

I know a lot of families, they might use something called a question jar where you put a whole bunch of questions in a jar and you make it a game or you have your kid pull a question out of the jar, open it up, and then each of you takes turns answering the questions. Because again, what's the goal? To get them to talk.

Now, if your child has an IEP or a 504 plan, you want to make sure that you use those goals to review. So if your child has ADHD, they more than likely have a goal in their IEP that says something about executive functioning. Remember, executive functioning is kind of like the way that we go about doing systems and processes in our lives. How do we organize things? So if that's the goal, then maybe use that language with your child and talk about, "Hey, in your IEP, it talks about you being really organized with your executive functioning. Do you feel organized? Tell me about what you're doing to organize yourself. Is there things that you think we can do to do better?"

And so using that language, it helps them understand what their diagnosis is, but it also helps them take ownership of what the IEP says. And we always want to make sure we empower our kids when we're having these conversations.

(05:01) Setting and tracking goals for the second semester

Julian: Another thing that I would recommend is to review schedules. Schedules are a huge, huge thing in all households. You want to make sure that you're taking time to just ask them, "Hey, how you feeling about all the things you're doing? Do you feel good about the way we're doing our schedule? Do you think we should change some things?" Because again, the goal is for you to have conversations with them about what's going well and what do they want to improve. And all of this conversation leads to the most important thing that you should do.

Don't leave the conversation without setting goals. Setting goals with your child is incredibly important. And so the idea of setting a goal really focuses on high-impact strategies, things that can be a leverage for a larger impact across different aspects of their lives. And I always like to use the terminology of smart goals. You can Google smart goals, the acronym, and it gives you a very clear cut, specific, measurable, achievable, and so on and so forth. But here's a couple of examples of goals that I've set with children before, and maybe you want to take some of them for yourselves. For example, every Friday, I'm going to organize my desk so it's neat and prepared for the next week of school.

And what does that match with? Executive functioning. So that's a goal that directly correlates to their IEP and it's something that's achievable, and every kid wants to make sure that they have something set. Here's another goal you could try. Mom and I are going to read for 10 minutes before bed every Tuesday and Thursday night. And that's the set routine and it's a goal and it's going to help not only the academic side of things, but it's also going to help them feel good about building their literacy skills. Here's one last one that I bet you a lot of you are going to like. I'm going to earn 30 minutes of Fortnite playtime with my friends every Friday night if I complete all of my homework for the week.

Now 30 minutes might be a long time, but maybe if you build up to a very specific incentive that's around socialization and playing video games with friends, that's a way of increasing socialization, but it attaches it to completing something that is tangible. That's a goal that's hitting all these different things. Now if you were listening to these examples, none of them mentioned school. It wasn't a specific academic focus. It wasn't a school-based thing. But they all will impact how school is going. But the key is setting those goals. Set goals that are achievable, that are focused on the child, and that come from them and you so you're working together to meeting it.

(07:45) Previewing the rest of the school year

Julian: Now, the last thing I would recommend is mapping out the rest of the year. The strategy is called previewing, and it's really important. You know, so many of us, you know, for me, I love kind of freestyling and doing things on the fly, but for a lot of us, we like structure. We like to know that things are planned ahead. We like to know what's coming. So take some time and open up a calendar and map out what the month is going to look like. And then map out what the next three months are going to look like.

Put things on the calendar, write out all the different things that are coming up. I know some kids would love to even put some of the things that they're looking forward to on their calendar. So if you can map out all the different activities or, for our household, we always put upcoming tests or assessments on our calendar just so everybody knows what's coming up. It can be a great uh, habit-forming activity, and it can be a bonding experience for you and your child. But it also helps them plan out what's coming next.

(08:44) Collaborating with teachers for midyear adjustments

Julian: So how do you get your teacher to help you? How do you get your teacher to help this process? They are an excellent resource, and you can tell them, "Hey, I wanted to hear how the year's going from your perspective. Here's what we came up with. What do you think?" so that they're a partner in the process. And if your child has an IEP or a 504, at any point, you can call or request a meeting and the entire IEP team can come together and review some progress monitoring to see where your child is at.

But if you don't want it to be like this formalized thing, maybe just have a quick conversation or a phone call, and in the process of the call, they're probably going to give you some suggestions. So here's what I would probably hear a teacher or an administrator say. They would probably tell you, "Maybe you can start working on using a checklist or maybe there's some sort of tracker or daily report that you might want to start using in school."

I know in my school, we use something called check-in or checkout, where children, they set their goals, and then they check in with a trusted adult in the morning, at the midday, at the afternoon, and they even fill out their trackers together. And it's a great way to build some consistency and structure into their day.

All right, y'all. So I've said a lot, and hopefully some of these suggestions are going to help you as you map out what the rest of the school year is going to look like. The one thing that you got to remember, the second half of the school year is a super important time to stop, reflect, and make adjustments. Talk with your child in a calm, relaxed space. Set some goals for yourself and for your child, and reach out to your