The hard truth about racism in special education: Part 1

Every parent wants the best for their child with learning and thinking differences. But for many families of color, the road to getting that support can feel like an uphill battle.

In this episode, we talk to Christopher Cola. Christopher is the father of a son with ADHD and dyslexia. Listen as he opens up about navigating a school district that didn’t always listen to his concerns. And find out why he wants to help other families avoid the struggles he endured.

We love to hear from our listeners. Email us at opportunitygap@understood.org.

Related resources

• Families of color and communicating with teachers

• Confronting racial bias within special education

Timestamps

(01:35) How Chris first noticed his child’s struggles

(06:24) Chris on the email that changed his life

(09:37) Chris on racism in special education

Episode transcript

Julian: Every parent wants the best for their child with learning and thinking differences. They want their child to thrive, to succeed in school, and to get the right support. But for many families of color, the road to getting the right support can feel like an uphill battle.

What's going on, OG family? Welcome to the "Opportunity Gap." I'm your host, Julian. Today, we're kicking off a two-part series on how institutional racism weaves its way into special education, shaping not just students' learning experiences, but their futures. Today, we'll hear from Chris Cola, a proud dad of his son with learning and thinking differences. Then in our next episode, we'll get insight from an education attorney on how the system can and should change. But first, let's dive into Chris's story. What's going on, Chris? Welcome to the show.

Christopher: Hey, man, Julian. Hey, good to be on, man. I'm excited to be part of the OG family. You know, this is definitely one of those life journeys that you only get a, you know, a few times that sort of express something that's happened to you personally that can hopefully benefit and help a lot of people going forward.

Julian: Yeah, I mean, this is, the whole purpose of our podcast is just to bring real people on and to share our stories so that we can gain something and help somebody else coming along the way. Let's jump right into it. Chris, can you tell us a little bit about your journey as a parent of a child with a learning disability? What led you to first notice your child's struggles?

(01:35) How Chris first noticed his child's struggles

Christopher: So, you know, we all think our kids are the brightest, the smartest, the all of this kind of stuff, right?

Julian: Yeah.

Christopher: And so, you know, it kind of started in elementary school to public elementary school for us. And, you know, he was doing fine through K, through first, through second, and then as you get to third and fourth grade, things started kind of shifting a little bit. You know, one of his teachers in fourth grade was like, "Hey, look, he's a small kid, but I I'm really struggling kind of reading his handwriting." And I'm like, "All right, I mean, I don't I don't know what that, like, fix it." Right? Like, I don't, I'm not a teacher, I don't know how to do that.

But then he went into fifth grade, it was really starting to hamper him on some sort of special specialized, you know, the state test and things of that nature. And the teacher, his teacher actually was one of the ones was like, "Hey, you know, we might need to get him tested," or I think she tested him on his own, potentially for dyslexia. And, you know, we go through the IEP process and all that's going to get stuffed in what I'm told through this process is that he has a mild case of dyslexia.

I don't know what that means, I'm like "All right, cool." They're like "Yeah, he just needs a little bit of extra time." I'm like, "OK." I'm like, "Cool. Is that it?" They're like, "Yeah, that's it." I'm like, "All right." So, you know, take that through fifth grade through middle school, and he's supposed to be getting this extra time during the class periods to take tests to do all of these sorts of things.

And every couple of years, we go these IEPs and I'm like, "Yeah, OK, well, what are we doing? How's it going? How's the, you know, how's it helping him?" And they're like, "Oh, well, he's not actually getting out of the classes." I'm like "I'm confused. If that's what he's supposed to do, why are we not doing that?" And they're like "Oh, well, you know, they just, the teacher thinks he's doing OK." And I'm like, "Yeah, that's that's not really what we're here for, right?" Like so I was like, "Well, if he needs the accommodation but we're not getting it, then something's off."

So fast forward, I put him into a private high school specifically because they had what is called a learning resource center, which was tied to helping kids with learning differences, right? Like, so I...

Julian: So you took him out, you took him out of public school and put him into private school.

Christopher: Right. Exactly. And so, by putting him into the private school, the learning resource counselor he had, which is additional to any other counselors, worked with him kind of one on one throughout the week. And we would have these conversations back and forth throughout the, you know, his freshman year semester, and it was like towards the end of the, like that between the fall and spring, it was just like, something's not working here. Like, what is it? And she suggested that I get him tested.

I was like, "Well, he already got tested. You know, the public schools, they tested and they said, you know, this is what... She's like "Yeah, no. It's something else." I said, "OK, let's do that." But let me pause there for a second to share with you some news that happened in the interim time between when we finished middle school, junior high, and then in the high school. So, the school district that we're in, which is the seventh largest in this country at the time, which is Houston ISD, the state of Texas thas said, put out an assessment that said the HISD has been failing kids in special education for the last six years, and I'm like, "Oh really?"

Julian: Oh wow. This must have been like an eye-opening experience for you because you're like...Got it.

Christopher: I'm like "Yeah, OK, so my kid is not progressing as I think he should because his grades are reflective of the challenges he's having, but the accommodations aren't helping. So, I'm like, something's going on. So, anyway, I put up like another three grand in go and get him tested and a test comes back that he's got ADHD, his dyslexia is air quote mild, didn't matter. But they're like it doesn't matter if it's mild or it's major, it's impacting him. And he doesn't need just accommodations, they introduced me to a new word called remediation.

I was like "Remediation? I thought this is permanent. I thought there was nothing..." They're like, "No, no, no, it is permanent, but there are techniques of things or different things you can do." And I'm like, "No one ever said this to me. Like no one ever offered him, it was almost... I'm not going to say that they just passed my kid along because he's a good-looking kid, he's smart, he's funny and all these sorts of things, but it kind of felt like that.

And so, you know, fast forward, we get these results back, and he's still in this private high school, give it to them. They're like, "Oh, well we could work with this. No problem. Yeah, we can...we understand now what's going on." And with that, I start to try to understand what is it that I can do as a dad? Like how can I solve this or help my son? And look, man, I don't know how religious the OG podcast gets, but I'm going to put this on God. I received an email from that house. They sent me an email about something called a dyslexia simulation.

(06:24) Chris on the email that changed his life

It's like ten books, you know, you go to this, you know, come to their facility and it's like a, I don't know, probably like 40 or 50 of us parents. I'm the oldest OG parent in here. Everybody else has got their younger kids a younger, you know, I've got a high schooler, right? So, they have I don't know, call it 6 to 8 stations or so that are set up in and around this conference room that go through this process of simulating what your child's dyslexia experiences.

Julian: Wow, OK.

Christopher: It's really dope, man. Like I, look, I send it to everybody I know. Somebody is like, "Oh, my kid has dyslexia," I was like, "Boom. Make sure you go figure this out so you'd know exactly what they're going through." And so, at the end of this session of, like I said, about eight tables, we circled around, you know, kind of groups of like 6 or 7, like all the parents, it's just nothing but tears, and when I say is God that did this, I received this email, that was the first time it had ever been done outside of the state of California, because it was like a UCLA or Berkeley, one of those schools, like it was their thing and they brought it to Texas. This is the first time it ever been done.

So, I was at the very first one ever done anywhere outside of California. And I was in tears, like every other parent. We're all sitting here like, "I had no idea that this was what they were experiencing. Like what is going on?" Like, I remember leaving from that house, my son comes home from school and I am a bowl of a mess. I'm in tears, and he's looking at me, and he's like, "Dad?" Like, and look, I'm a big dude. I played college football like I, you know, I'm not that guy. Like, you know, I'm a cancer, so I'm a little sensitive, but that's for another day.

Julian: As am I. As am I. I'm right there with you.

Christopher: So, you know what I'm saying, man, we're gonna cry sometimes. We got our emotions, man. So, anyway, I'm crying, and I'm just like, "Son, I had no idea you were experiencing this is what was going on." And so, it was at that moment, man, like, I realized that two things happened. One, I appreciate the teacher that looked at him in fourth and fifth grade and said, "Hey, this is what he needs, or let's test to see if he has dyslexia." But then every step passed that, I was failed, he was failed. We didn't know.

Julian: I can feel how much you loved him just by the way, you know. I, you know, I haven't met you in person, but I can feel the way that y'all love each other, just in the way you talk about the young man. And you know, and it sounds like one, you didn't get the support you needed when he was younger. You took it upon yourself to continue to ask questions. You educated yourself, and then you took out your own money to put him into a place that was going to support him. And so, I'm wondering, do you think, Chris, that race played a role at all in the way that you or your son or your family were treated or not treated in terms of the perception of your school experience?

(09:37) Chris on racism in special education

Christopher: I was very blessed for him to have actually really great teachers. My mother was a teacher, you know, for 30-plus years, man. And so, I've got a lot of respect for teachers and what they've done and what they do. And it's a hard job, right? Like trying to figure it out. And so, I really applaud and appreciate the teachers, man. And they've always been solid with him.

But there is, again, not only my words, but the Texas Education Agency said the Houston ISD that is, was failing special education students. Race, specifically, I would say played a part in it because for us, though the teachers were supportive and they did their thing, I know of non-Black students who had dyslexia that were having a different experience in the same public school system.

Now, can I say that that's specifically race? You know, we got to be careful with this environment of like I'm the, I call on nobody out or nothing, that's why I'm not even using names, right? So, the fact that my son wasn't pulled and made sure these things happened, I don't know what else this is sort of equate that to what I know white students with dyslexia were pulled out, and I know this too, because my son's like, "Oh yeah, they pulled so-and-so. And yeah, we do sometimes have classes together and this and that." So, I'm like, "Well, why aren't you getting the same sort of thing?"

Julian: I'm an assistant principal. I work with phenomenal teachers, and there are so many phenomenal teachers out there that are working every single day to support our children. But the system in which we work in is really difficult. And in some cases, there's institutional racism that is pervasive. And it sounds like from the outsider looking in. You and your son were a victim of that institutional situation, you know, thinking about this journey you went on, right? You know, your son's now playing football.

Christopher: It's still going on now. We're still on it.

Julian: Oh, yeah, you've been on a long trek. It's not over yet.

Christopher: Yeah, yeah.

Julian: But, you know, your son is now, you graduated high school with a 3.3. He's at the college level. You have another son. You know, you're a solo dad navigating this situation. I'm wondering, just thinking about your own relationship with your son. What did it do for that?

Christopher: Man, you're going to try to get me emotional on this show, man. I told you, I'm a cancer, man.

Julian: Well you said you were emotional, I mean, it's OK. It's OK.

Christopher: The relationship with my older son is something that words can't really even describe, man. It's a beautiful thing, man, and it's something that I'm blessed and grateful for. It's honestly this journey, through this dyslexia challenge, it's he and I both learning what dyslexia was doing to him. Because here's the thing, we now know when he's like, "Dad, I can't remember the exact thing. It's the this, that, that, this, this," and he will describe all the way around it. I'm like, "Oh, that's that." He's like, "Yeah, that's it."

I understand that that's the dyslexia. More importantly, he understands that that's the dyslexia. He is no longer feeling personally dumb or feeling personally like he's not good enough or smart enough or any of these things. He knows and he knows I got his back and I'm going to help him through these things so that when I see him sort of slide a little bit, I said, "Hey, hey, let's, let's, that's the ADHD talking. Let's, let's..." and he's like, "Oh, OK." And he can ratchet it back a little bit, right? Like because we are both disciplined that he uses medication on occasion, especially when he needs to focus for school.

He's like, "If I need to lock in for an exam, if I need to lock in for something," he uses it. And this is honestly not a discussion that we had, it was more like an understanding, like the medicine is a tool. It's not a savior, right? Like, live life, it's God didn't, you're not broken. God made you who you are and how you are. And it's OK that your brain and your mind works how it works.

Julian: You know, I think that you've created a blueprint for so many of our other families out there that are at the beginning, they're struggling, they don't know what to do. The resources that you provided, the story, the hope that you shared, those are things that are going to inspire others. So, I would just say, please keep sharing your story. Please keep sharing what you did. Keep putting it out there because there's a lot of folks that are struggling and they want to hear that there's hope and you've done it.

You know, you're not done yet. You've definitely done a lot. And I applaud you. I could speak to a lot of people on this show, and it's just really nice to hear a Black father advocating for his son. So, thank you, thank you, thank you.

Christopher: I appreciate you, Julian, man. And thank you, OG. Thank you for inviting me to be a part of this. It's an honor and I really appreciate that.

Julian: That wraps today's episode. Chris. Chris, Chris, Chris, thank you so much for joining us and for sharing your story with us. I want to meet your son. I really do. OG family, stay tuned for part two to this conversation. You don't want to miss it. Until next time, see you out there, OG family!

Thanks so much for listening today. We love hearing from our listeners. So, if you have any thoughts about today's episode, you can email us at opportunitygap@understood.org. And be sure to check out the show notes for links and resources to anything we mentioned in the episode.

This show is brought to you by Understood.org. Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences like ADHD and dyslexia.

The "Opportunity Gap" is produced by the Tara Drinks and edited by Daniela Tello-Garzon. Our theme music was written by Justin D. Wright, who also mixes the show. Ash Beecher is our supervising producer. Briana Berry is our production director. Neil Drumming is our editorial director. Our executive directors are Laura Key, Scott Cocchiere, and Seth Melnick. Thanks again for listening.